Baggage Sometimes Sticks And Then What
“You’re always so happy when you answer the phone.”
Her eyes were sad. Her grin was weak. I felt bad for a second, but then realized at least I helped her smile.
Life isn’t easy. It isn’t easy to always smile and to answer the phone with a calm accommodating voice. But I do it. There are days when I wake up and I don’t want to budge. I don’t want to think. I don’t want to answer the phone and be happy.
I have to though, and I have to give the stranger on the phone my best shot for kindness. Why? Because they don’t deserve my garbage.
I’m human. I fall down. And I’ve certainly screwed up. It gets stuck inside and I think and think until I drive myself crazy. I have to pick myself up though, and it’s not always easy.
So what do I do that helps?
I look at pictures around my desk—one’s I’ve place around that purposefully remind me of good times. I keep funny little things my kids say and I read them. I read happy quotes. I think about my dreams and I want them.
I looked at my mirror, at all the inspiring people I had taped up on my wall and decided I wanted something different. I was on the road to high school and I had dreams of getting out of town and finding the perfect job, the place to live, and the family I wanted. Losing weight became one of my dreams. That’s when I realized the power in me. One day at a time. One meal at a time. Exercise three days a week. It was slow to fall off at first, but then 40 pounds just melted away. And reaching that goal was a wake up call: I knew if I worked and wanted something, I had the power to make it happen.
Today, when I don’t feel so great, I tell myself, no matter what still jumps around inside of me, I will go in and do my job. I will go in and do it well because they need me.
Because that’s another step in making my dreams come true. My dad said to me today, “think good thoughts and say good things. Nice thoughts and good things will make their way to you eventually.”
That made me smile. I love you dad, you helped me stay on track. Again, sometimes it’s the little things that matter. Believe in them. And believe in you.